Will My Dog Trust Me Again After Hitting Him? Research and Tips
Whether your dog will regain trust after hitting him, will depend on a variety of factors.
These factors may include your dog's temperament, his past life experiences, and the severity of the hit.
A primary factor that will impact your dog's ability to bounce back, is how you will approach your dog and your future plans moving forward.
If no plans are made to prevent the hitting instances from repeating, there are chances the dog may never recover and there may be everlasting effects.
Of course, you don't want that to happen!
Discover several ways you can regain your dog's trust and work on restoring a healthy relationship.
Will My Dog Trust Me Again After Hitting Him?
Dogs are generally very "forgiving" animals. Given the opportunity, they can learn to trust again as long as the most appropriate steps are taken.
As mentioned, there are several factors to consider when evaluating whether a dog will learn to trust again after being hit.
All dogs are different, and even within a litter of puppies of the same breed, there will be wide differences among one and another.
Let's take a closer look at several factors that may impact how your dog may respond to your attempts of "making peace" and asking for "forgiveness."
The Dog's Temperament
Let's consider a dog's individual temperament. Some dogs are far more sensitive than others and may require more time to overcome any intentional or accidental mistreatment.
Soft dogs may show "submissive body language" when approached under the form of a lowered body, tail between the legs and ears folded back. They may also roll over their back and sometimes pee.
While so-called "soft dogs" may seem to suffer the most, it's important to note that even dogs who may appear to be more "resilient" aren't immune to the effects of being hit.
These dogs may not show the effects, but they are still being impacted at a deep, internal level.
The Dog's Past History
If your dog has a history of being abused, it's natural for him to respond poorly to any type of mistreatment.
It's important to point out though that many dogs who act fearfully are often assumed to have a history of abuse, when in reality they may have not been socialized enough as puppies.
Many dogs who act fearful of men, haven't been abused by them, but in reality, they just happen to be naturally fearful of their features and the way they talk, walk or move.
The Severity of the Hit
A quick little swat on a dog's butt, may not have as much of an impact compared to a dog being grabbed and subjected to an alpha roll.
This is not to say that this type of intervention is justified. Not at all.
It's just that some types of hitting may be a little more "innocent" than others, although, to a soft dog, even a stern tone of voice or direct eye contact may feel intimidating as much as being hit.
The accompanying body language and tone of voice can also have quite an impact.
Yelling at the dog and grabbing the dog harshly, will cause intense fear in most dogs. Hurting the dog in any way will obviously cause physical and emotional harm.
Any type of hitting in the long run may end up negatively impacting the dog's well-being and sense of trust and may even trigger defensive aggression in the long run.
Any type of hitting can have negative repercussions
The Impact of Hitting Dogs
Dogs are ultimately sentient beings. They come to depend on us as their main caretakers and providers for food, safety and security.
Studies have found that dogs, just like children, display a secure base effect relying on their owners as a secure base for interacting with the environment.
Hitting a dog risks deeply damaging the trust (or any growing trust) between the dog and owner.
Affected dogs may come to perceive their owners as a source of fear and potential risk of harm, which can ultimately lead to several negative repercussions.
Harsh Correction Methods Can Lead to Aggression Studies Say
On top of developing fear, hitting dogs or using any harsh, aversive techniques, may lead to dogs showing signs of aggression.
This has been proven in particular by a study which focused on the outcomes of dogs subjected to harsh corrective methods.
"Our study demonstrated that many confrontational training methods, whether staring down dogs, striking them or intimidating them with physical manipulation does little to correct improper behavior and can elicit aggressive responses," points out board-certified veterinary behaviorist, Dr. Meghan E. Herron.
The aggressive reactions in these cases are triggered by a dog's need for self-protection. In other words, the dog is fearful and is protecting himself from harm.
Similar to a child who pushes away a bully, a dog may only take so much and a day may come where he will react with threatening behaviors such as a growl or snarl.
Dogs Don't Misbehave Because They are Alpha Wannabees
It's unfortunate, but many owners end up hitting their dogs because they misinterpret a dog's behaviors.
When a dog misbehaves, owners suspect that the dog is "challenging them" or trying to "rule the roost." As a result, owners feel the need of using confrontational methods to establish themselves as the 'alpha" or "leader of the pack."
These beliefs are perpetuated by TV, books and punishment-based training advocates, points out Dr. Herron. “These techniques are fear-eliciting and may lead to owner-directed aggression.”
Despite their popularity, these beliefs are outdated and derive from old studies conducted on wolves raised in captivity by Robert Shenkel. Intrigued? Discover more: what is an alpha dog?
Fortunately, nowadays we know better. Dogs are not really vying for top position nor are they seeking revenge or acting out of spite.
Most behaviors we dislike such as excessive barking, jumping and not coming when called occur because they have been inadvertently reinforced, and the dogs carrying them out haven't been trained alternate more appropriate behaviors, points out the American Veterinary Society of Animal Behavior in a position statement.
You can take several steps to reestablish trust with your dog
How Can I Get My Dog to Trust Me Again?
To gain your dog's trust back, you will have to take a multi-faceted approach tackling the issue from a variety of angles. Following are several tips.
Commit to Never Hitting Again
The very first step for getting your dog to trust you again is to firstly commit to never hitting your dog again.
Hitting may make you feel better initially because it allows you to vent your frustration or anger at the moment. This is especially true if you feel helpless in a given situation.
However, hitting does nothing to ameliorate the situation-if only, it makes matters much worse.
Take a Deep Breath
When you feel like you're losing your patience, take a deep breath and commit to using your brain more than your hands or stern voice.
Remind yourself that, by hitting your dog, you're only making matters worse rather than solving the problem.
Also remember that your dog isn't misbehaving on purpose just to "get on your nerves."
Your dog, just like a child, needs your gentle and patient guidance and understanding.
Learn How to Train Your Dog
Rather than correcting your dog for misbehaving, focus on training your dog behaviors you would like seeing him perform instead.
Commit to using positive reinforcement training. Did you know that positive reinforcement is the best dog training method in the world?
Your dog jumps? Train him to sit. Your dog pulls on the leash? Train him to heel. Your dog barks when you prepare his meals? Train him to lie patiently on a mat.
Training may take some time, but it's worth every minute because it allows your dog to learn desirable behaviors so that you can also enjoy his companionship more.
Have a professional help you out in restoring your relationship.
Spend Quality Time Together
Hang out with your dog, enjoying pleasant times together. Examples of activities that can help create or restore bond include:
- Feeding your dog
- Taking your dog on car rides to a favorite pet store to grab some treats
- Going together on a hike and exploring together the lovely scenery
- Enrolling your dog in a fun canine sport where you get to work as a team
- Training your dog using positive methods
- Encouraging your dog to play brain games and praising him for solving puzzles
- Taking your dog on walks and feeding him treats when he's behaving nicely
- Playing a game of fetch in the yard
- Cuddling with your dog on the couch as you tell him how special he is
Of course, all dogs are different and may enjoy different activities, but these are just a few examples of ways to build a positive relationship and establish trust.
How to Fix Hand Shyness in Dogs
If your dog has developed a fear of your hands, you will need to take steps to establish positive associations with them.
You can do this by dropping treats from your hands, hand-feeding your dog, and teaching your dog to target your hands.
If your dog appears fearful of being touched, create positive associations with touch.
Here is a guide on how to help hand-shy dogs. Please work along with a professional if your dog dreads being touched and exhibits aggressive behavior.
Do Dogs Understand Apologies?
If you hit your dog accidentally or the hitting was intentional, you may wonder if your dog will understand if you apologize to him.
Do dogs apologize to each other? A study has revealed some interesting findings after observing dogs undergo conflict and reconciliation efforts at dog parks.
The results seem to suggest that, after conflict, dogs appear "to apologize" and the effort seems to be made for the purpose of restoring peace.
It's as if its meant to reduce any stress associated with uncertainty about future conflicts, points out Kristie Miller, a research fellow in philosophy at the University of Sydney, Australia in an article on Psychology Today.
While we may not know whether dogs understand apologies in the same we do, one thing is for sure: it certainly feels good to tell our dogs "I'm sorry," especially when your dog licks you back as if to say: "We're still good my friend, no worries!"
References:
- Horn L, Huber L, Range F (2013) The Importance of the Secure Base Effect for Domestic Dogs – Evidence from a Manipulative Problem-Solving Task. PLoS ONE
- Herron et al. Survey of the use and outcome of confrontational and non-confrontational training methods in client-owned dogs showing undesired behaviors. Applied Animal Behaviour Science, 2009
- University of Pennsylvania. "If You're Aggressive, Your Dog Will Be Too, Says Veterinary Study." ScienceDaily. ScienceDaily, 18 February 2009.
- Kristina A.F. Walters, Christine King, Christine L.C. Scolaro, Melissa R. Shyan-Norwalt,
- Reconciliation in domestic dogs (Canis familiaris): Evidence for the uncertainty reduction hypothesis, Applied Animal Behaviour Science, Volume 226, 2020
- Psychology Today: Do Dogs Forgive and If So, Why? by Kristie L Miller PhD
Disclaimer: this article is not meant to be used as a substitute for professional veterinary advice or behavioral advice. If your dog is acting sick or aggressive please consult with a qualified professional for proper diagnosis and treatment.
